I think we all can agree that 2016 was a rough one and 2017 hasn’t exactly been a picnic either. Movies continue to be my saving grace during these uncertain times but finding the energy and brainpower to write about them is often times an impossible task. I’ve also struggled to maintain an online presence as social media has evolved from a fun place to take your mind off your problems to a 24/7 modern day town crier of doom. Tumblr is all “everything you love is actually offensive and here’s why you’re a bad person for even liking it in the first place” all the time and I deleted Twitter off my phone in the days following the election and I’m still attempting to find my voice in that site’s new normal.
My annual Top 25 list was fairly locked back in January; I even boasted on Twitter that for the first time in years -maybe ever- I was so in love with my choices that I didn’t feel the need to wait and see what awards season told me were the Important Films to watch. I knew what I liked and I was excited about it; I even made some decent headway on writing about my selections. But as the weeks went on and the world continued to self-destruct, I started feeling more and more foolish for caring about finishing such an inconsequential project and I felt even sillier for asking anyone else to care about something so trivial and self-serving. So I stopped writing. And now here we are, almost at the end of another year.
The world hasn’t improved at all but I guess my morale has because I basically woke up one day and just started writing. Not just my regular film diary (because that had sadly fallen by the wayside as well) but this particular post. I’ve definitely written more in the past weeks than I have in all of 2016 & 2017 combined. I’m not planning on asking anyone to read this (not only does it still feel unimportant and embarrassing but now it’s completely irrelevant) but I wanted to finish this for myself. (Which sounds empowering and special but it’s honestly more like my brain will NOT be able to get over leaving this as a draft.) Some of the rankings have shuffled a bit as I’ve started editing and reevaluating some things (nothing major, I’m talking arbitrary lower rankings) but for the most part, this is basically the same list I would’ve posted at the beginning of the year.